I want to talk to you about a big aha I had after running my Digital Insiders mastermind last week. And if any of you follow me on social media you probably saw posts and Instagram stories and the like, but the thing I want to talk about today is sort of one of those things that we all just say, “Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, it’s important.” But we don’t realize just how important it is.
So there was a reoccurring theme at the mastermind last week and it happened so frequently and so consistently that I had to share it with you guys. And it boils down to this, I’m going to give you sort of the punch line and then explain why I think it’s so important. People struggle to understand their value. And I’d watch as people would go up to the front of the room and talk about what they were working on or where they were stuck, and casually mention a skill set or a super power they had and I’d watch as other people in the room would get so excited about someone. Right, they’d get excited about either their idea or their business model, and it almost registered as surprise on the face of the person who was presenting. It was kind of like, “Really, you think that’s so amazing?” and everyone’s like, “Oh my God, yes.”
And sometimes, in some cases, we would 10 or 15 minutes talking to that person, convincing them that what they just said was an amazing idea and they should pursue it with all their resources and energy. And this happened over and over again. And then we had some guy who got up, and I’m just trying to keep it anonymous here, and he was talking about stuff, and then he just casually mentioned this idea he had in his back pocket, and we were like, “Why did you wait 12 minutes into this presentation to tell us about that, because that is awesome.”
So why am I telling you all this? I think there’s a large chance that you guys listening today, number one either hopefully have a massive aha that this is you too, you struggle to understand your value. Or you’re going to be like, “Yes, I know this but I’m not sure how to change it.” And if you’re thinking to yourself, “I’m not sure this is that important or relevant to business.” I would argue that anyone who struggles to understand their value will only succeed to the level that they’ve become comfortable with. And I know this personally from experience, it’s happened several times. And I still struggle with it. I’m not, you know, I haven’t arrived at my destination either.
So things like this, do any of these statements sort of resonate with you? My skills and abilities are nothing special. I’m a dime a dozen agency, service provider, coach, etc. I would never rub shoulders with someone on my dream 100 in any meaningful way. My past failures are evidence that I don’t have what it takes. I don’t have anything new or unique to offer in the market. Even if I do have something amazing for the world, my personal habits in life prevent me from finishing what I start.
So if those resonate with you, then this message today is for you. During the event last week several of the members stood up and they offered a give, a particular presentation. We had amazing gives, gives on Instagram stories, Facebook ads, personality taxes, trello, webinars, dream 100, marketing retreats, sales, it was amazing. You should have been there. If you’re not in Digital Insiders and you know that your business would qualify for it, we need to talk. But that’s not the point of this podcast today.
So there’s one give in particular that goes with what I’m sharing today. His name is Tyler Clark, amazing guy. He got up and talked about the importance of loving yourself, and at first you might think, that’s kind of odd. But he presented such a logical and well thought out case for the need for self love as the basis for every possible love and success we want in life. The funny part about this is Tyler is an accountant. He’s not a personal development expert or a coach. But yet his talk hit home because number one, it was super logical and well thought out, but whatever weird attachments we prescribed to the idea of loving ourselves and understanding our own value, it needs to go away if we’re going to reach the dreams and the goals that we have. We must learn how to increase our own self love, for without it we have nothing to give.
So if you are unable to recognize your true ability or see in value your unique gifts, you will remain stuck at the level that you’ve been at. Why? Why is that so true? Because the hardest bet we make, is the bet we make on ourselves. And I realized this one day when I saw how easily other people were betting on me. When I left Clickfunnels people were offering me deals, positions, C level jobs, and I thought, “These people are more likely to bet on me, than I am willing to bet on me.” And to some degree, when I joined Clickfunnels it was an incredible opportunity, a strategic opportunity, but you can even see in that moment, having already hit 7 figures in business on my own, I still struggled to bet and believe that I could go the distance, even though I was seeing other people, people that I greatly respect, like Russell, bet on my and be like, “No, I think you’re awesome, and I think you have this skill and I want you on my team.” I was struggling to bet on myself.
So think about that. If you see other people regularly betting on you, whether you’re a service provider, agency, coach, consultant, they’re betting on you but you won’t bet on you, that’s a sign that you have no idea how valuable you are. So the first step to fixing it all is realizing that you’re blind. That you have a blind spot, you can’t see what you can’t see. You know? And the only way to solve this is to take a risk and put yourself in a vulnerable position with other people who can act as a mirror to reflect back that which you cannot see.
So I don’t care if it’s a therapist, a coach, a mastermind, a group of friends, also side note, pick carefully who you do this with, other people speaking into your life will be the thing that takes away those blocks. That’s why we cannot play this game alone. We don’t play alone in life, we certainly can’t do it in business. And the gift in all of this is that once you can see this, you see this blind spot, you can then transform your belief, claim it as your own, protect it, grow it, nurture it.
I remember the first time that I really had an aha moment. People were betting on me as an agency at the time, because they trusted and valued my abilities, and I was launching these funnels that would then produce lots and lots of money. And they trusted my ability to produce a funnel and this is when I realized, I was like, my fear of launching my own funnel was because I had not figured out just how valuable my skill set was. And the minute I did, I finally had a breakthrough and built one. And that’s exactly what happened.
Most of our external blocks in business are caused by an internal block. A couple of examples: Are you stuck charging too little for what you offer, even though you’re as good as other people who charge double? There’s literally only one thing standing in your way, and it’s you and your own brain and you’re lack of belief. That’s it. The difference, if you take two people with equal skill sets, and one charges a thousand dollars and one charges a hundred dollars, the only difference between those two is belief.
Another example would be if you’re stuck in the endless cycle of starting things and stopping. You know what I mean? When you just start and then you stop. The only thing standing in your way is yourself, a belief that if you fail you’re going to be rejected or unworthy, or a belief that you’re not finishing something because you’re just kind of cookie cutter? Or a belief that no one will care, so why bother?
And I know a lot of you might be like, “Wow, this just feels so fluffy and unhelpful. I want strategy, I want tactics.” And this is my point. My entire point of this podcast is right here. All of the strategy and all of the tactics in the world will never be used successfully if the brain you’re feeding it to already has decided you’re not worth it. Because to me, that’s like saving money in an account where a gambling addict, has an unlimited debit card to withdraw. It’s completely leaky. All the strategies and the tactics and the learning and the over learning, will just fall through if the brain that is being fed all of this, has already decided that you’re not valuable and you’re not worth it.
So people are the key. If you don’t have someone in your life that can help you see the blind spots, it’s the most important thing you can put on your to do list today. So this podcast I hope gave you the belief that your number one priority, your number one resource, your number one job is to fill the bank of you, for without it you’re going to rob the world of your unique message and mission and that was probably one of the biggest takeaways I had about the mastermind and the reality of watching all of those false beliefs shatter, and that transformation happen when people realized, “Oh my gosh, I’m not betting on me and look at all these people betting on me.” And that revelation that they’re valuable and they have an amazing thing to offer, was exactly the reason why everyone around who’s had any success will say that who you surround yourself with and who you hook up your wagon to, is one of the most important things you can do in business because it will be a mirror to reflect back your own potential. Appreciate you guys, talk to you soon. Bye.